I write this with a heart full of
emotions. The things I have experienced and learned within the past couple of
days have been life changing. For most of my life, I’ve felt like there was so
much I understood in the world, maybe not understood, but at least was aware
of. I was wrong.
For the first time since I’ve been
in the Dominican I spent a night outside of the GAP apartments. I spent Sunday
night at the school (Emanuel House) I will be working at every Monday for the
rest of my time here. I really wish I was a stronger writer so that I could
accurately paint a picture of what this time was like. I experienced times of
joy, sadness, laughter, confusion and with each emotion there was a movement in
my heart. There has been movement in my heart since I walked off that plane on
August 26th, but much like
when a seed is planted underneath the soil, you can’t see its growth until it
breaks through the soil and reveals itself. My heart has been broken, and it
has changed me.
I wrote the above two paragraphs a
week ago. I couldn’t bring myself to continue writing because the emotion was
too much for me to convey at that moment. I honestly believe that if I would
have attempted to explain what was going on in my heart, none of you would
understand. Now I am ready, not only because I have had time to work through
the emotions, but because the time I spent at Emanuel House this week has been
an encouragement in many ways.
The first week I was at Emanuel
House, I met five beautiful sisters. The oldest is 13 and the youngest is 5.
These girls were full of life. Full of energy and laughter, it was hard not to
smile when they were around. One of the sisters who is 10 went to school for
the first time that day. Later she sat on my lap for almost an hour looking at a
book. She is hungry for knowledge and up to this point has never had the
opportunity to go to school. It wasn’t till we were on our drive home that I
heard their story. Their mother had been fighting cancer for over a year, their
dad was not in the picture, therefore it was the older girl’s responsibility to
help take of their other siblings, and mother as she lay on her death bed.
Their mother recently passed away, and now dad is back in the picture. I will
not go into too much detail, but these young girls are often found walking the
streets by themselves in a community where rape is common. It is also assumed
that they are given little to no food, except for the food they’re given at
Emanuel House. My heart broke and breaks even now for these beautiful girls
because they are at great risk for harm. I spent a lot of time this past week
praying and asking God how He could allow this to happen. I was reminded that
we live in a corrupt and sin infused world, and it literally made me sick.
One day as I was praying and
reading my Bible, I read Psalm 33. In the latter half of the Psalm it talks
about God seeing and knowing all who live on earth. Verse 19 stuck out to me,
it says “to deliver them(those who hope in His love) from death and keep them
alive in famine.” I can’t fully explain why this verse had given me a peace and
hope about the girls’ situation, but I have taken note that it does not say God
will keep us from famine, but will keep us alive in famine. Since we live in
this world, we are affected by the sin of this world, but God is victorious. We
may not see it in the darkness of our circumstances, but we will see it in the
light of eternity.
As I went to Emanuel house for my
second overnight Sunday, I was pushed beyond my comfort zone and shown the strength
of the LORD. I wrote in my journal that night something that God would fulfill
the very next morning! This is what I said “God help me to move out of my
comfort zone and be completely used by you! Please be my hands & feet. Be
my mouth & speak kindness and love. You have called me to love the broken,
I am also BROKEN. But you, Mighty Savior are not!”
I woke up Monday morning and at 8am
went to the special ed classroom that I helped out with the week before. I quickly
found out that the classroom teacher was sick and they had no replacement. So,
I, the American with extremely limited Spanish, was given the task of teaching!
This is the only school in all of the area that has a special needs program.
Emanuel House is a beacon of hope for all of its students, that come from the
poorest and roughest areas of Quisqueya; when I say these children have
nothing, that is quite literally what I mean.
To say I was nervous would be an understatement, but I made it through.
After the first session of school was over I went upstairs to the room that I
stayed in and cried. I cried because I had the opportunity to do something that
God put in my heart 15 months ago, and that was to teach in the Dominican
Republic. These children with special needs face even more odds than the
average Dominican child because they have disabilities in an uninformed country
where they are literally treated as outcasts with no potential. Hope. Hope that
even in this corrupt and dark world, God’s love is shining so bright and it has
the ability to reach the darkest of corners.
I just want to take a moment and
thank you all for your support! Thank you, although some of the situations I
have encountered here are heart wrenching, there have been so many positive
experiences as well. God is working and moving. He is good. Life is still
beautiful. As Anne Frank said, “How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a
single moment before starting to improve the world.” Today, be a difference maker; a world changer.
